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Until then, I will meet people in person to find those who can appreciate me for who — not what — I am.READ MORE: Why I hate farmers markets My friend dared me to delete my dating apps. had a lot of users who have come in, said they listened to the episode on race, and now are dropping their ethnicity filters.So that’s been a great response.” “Overall, I’m not sure how much online dating can do to ‘fix’ dating,” Kay added.If you’re a black woman, as I am, or an Asian man, Ok Cupid data shows that you’re likely to receive fewer matches and messages. It became glaringly obvious that I was getting far fewer matches and messages while online dating than my non-black friends.The people who design and create these sites and tools are working to address this disparity in user experience, but their attempts and failures show just how deeply ingrained racism is in our society.Newer sites have had similar experiences with racial bias.

But so far, it hasn’t proven to be the greatest force for social change, other than by making data about trends more easily accessible, and opening up dialogues on important issues like these.” That last part has stuck with me.I haven’t been able to find this dating site that prompts users to engage in greater empathy. The responsibility, however, does not merely rest with the creators of online dating tools or podcast producers. Much like my attempt to quit Facebook, this latest digital abandonment might not stick.I will gladly return if and when dating sites improve the experience.A few clicks put online dating in the rear-view mirror. Regardless of the type of app or site, online dating works better for some than others — a lot better, in fact. Chief among them was that I did not want to participate in platforms where users are given tools to discriminate based on race.